"My body's here on Earth but I'm floating"

"You can work your way to the top."

… I whispered in my mind. My soul is coming out the thick layers of my skin, as my flesh and internal organs lay flat and still on the dirt. I died making my way back from an attempt to break into a bank. I committed such a crime only to provide money for my family. It was the concept of doing the wrong things for the right reasons. My family couldn’t provide much and my father would occasionally rob a few small and unsecured businesses, getting away with it multiple times. Although I never entirely agreed with him and feared what was to come, I’ve seemed to inherit his little tactics. 

The guilt follows me and stays deep in my soul. What is still left of me wants to go back in the past and revert everything to be back in my small, cramped home. All I am right now is my spirit, lingering in purgatory, the train to heaven. It was a huge tug- a -war. Hands were trying to reach above, out of this huge crater-like hole. I somehow slipped through a small crack in the large bowl, all the way into hell. 

Hell was the ground level of afterlife. It wasn’t the fiery ball people assumed it was. It was much less than that; everything was pitch-black and empty. You could only hear echos of faint wails. I began to contemplate life and I wondered if my life was ever worth more than this.

In the moment, I could hear someone humming melodiously and it made me realize, I’m not alone in the dark. I used my voice to communicate with the people I couldn’t see, and even though I had no idea who they were, I knew that deep down and past their devious sins was goodness. I bonded and connected with “the devils.” It felt very warming, like home.

"I'm way up in the clouds"

"And they say I've made it now"

"But I've figured it out"

The lord from above must have witnessed my ability to bring togetherness in the “torturous afterlife” he designed. He lifted me up into heaven and began discussing with me. It was all happening very suddenly and I didn’t know why it was so hard to accept his invitation to live forever with the “pure souls.” 

I then realized, the people suffering beneath needed another shoulder to lean on. It would be very self indulgent of me to move on and roam freely on the path of never-ending clouds when I’ve seen what it’s like for others to be trapped in a world of darkness. It was like playing solitaire with no cards, no movement, and no escape; it was living everyday with without purpose and having nothing to do. Regardless, I would feel isolated and disconnected from the “pure angels” or “good-doing saints” if I chose to stay in Heaven.

Though God was shocked, he granted my wishes. Both he and I knew that it’ was my immortal life, and I had good-intentions in choosing what to do with it.

So down I went.

"Everything I need is on the ground."