We all crave love. No matter how much we deny it, love is something that as humans, we tend to chase. When loving someone, we try to show the other person the best version of ourselves. There’s nothing wrong with this, but most of us don’t realize that the best version of ourselves comes with flaws one way or another. We hold onto our feelings and thoughts because we’re scared that if we show them, that the other person will look at us differently. As scary as it is, nothing is scarier than losing a part of your happiness due to something that could’ve been easily fixed. The truth is, love repels and resentment is attracted when we bottle up our emotions. In order to have healthy relationships, we must communicate in order to stabilize and grow relationships.

Miscommunication is one of the root causes for toxic relationships and conflicts can be resolved by communication so that resentment isn’t built up upon the relationship. It’s likely that miscommunication has been an issue before Taurus the Bull was recognized as a constellation. This concept has been recognized in a famous poem by Shakespeare, “Othello.” In the poem, Othello is a general who is gaslighted and manipulated by Iago into thinking that his wife, Desdemona, is cheating on him with lieutenant Cassio. Instead of taking a step back and consulting Desdemona about the rumor, Othello jumps to conclusions and expresses a boiling sense of rage. This rage got out of control to the point where he wanted to “tear her all to pieces.” If effective communication was involved, the situation wouldn’t have ended the way it did. Othello and Desdemona would have grown old together but both of their lives were taken by miscommunication. As of present day, similar situations still occur which is unfortunate because if us humans were to just recognize the importance of communication, we can grow and learn to be better for ourselves and the people that we love.

Boundaries should be set by communication in order to establish comfort in relationships. Boundaries are rules within a relationship that both sides should respect to ensure a healthy emotional and physical wellbeing. When we love someone, we always want to learn more about them in order to meet their needs. Avoiding the unknown unknowns is necessary because you can’t love someone when you don’t know them well, if anything, you’ve mistaken lust for love. Unknown unknowns can be defined as: “the things we do not know we don’t know.” Healthy relationships aren’t healthy if boundaries aren’t set and needs aren’t met. When needs are met, people are happy and when boundaries are set, people are comfortable. That’s why it’s important for partners to acknowledge these things (preferably early on in the relationship) to avoid misunderstandings. As the relationship progresses, couples can learn from mistakes and fix them. The reason for a breakup shouldn’t happen just because both sides “didn’t know” how one another felt. 

Communication shouldn’t only occur during conflict, it should be a repetitive thing. Each and every one of us have been through different situations and our insight on life is completely different from one another. A small conversation about each other’s day can lead to a lot more than people think. These conversations don’t always have to be deep, but it can present different views on life in which people can be influenced by and implement a few things they’ve learned into their own lives for the better. These simple conversations can keep the relationship alive. This ties into the Mojave Phone Booth phenomenon. The event describes a man and his friends who called a phone booth in the middle of the Mojave desert everyday until someone answered. From that day on, travelers started calling that phone booth and talking to other strangers for hours. From that phone booth, connections were made and those connections meant a lot to the people who called. If strangers can build that kind of connection through a simple conversation about life in general, relationships can strengthen more than anyone could ever imagine. 

Relationships start due to communication, therefore it should be maintained to keep relationships. Two people in love are meant to succeed together and if no one can use their words, nothing will ever be successful. In fact, it would just be toxic. Communication is used when a partner is trying to fix things with the other person in hopes to not lose them. If the person doesn’t understand that, then the person isn’t the one. Relationships require an open mind, those who can’t meet that standard are simply just not ready for a relationship.