[10th Grade]

Well this year was something. Where did it all begin..?

Before school even started, it began with a struggle. Drama, conflict, acceptance… my friends, my family, my team—everything seemed to be falling apart. 

The end of 2023 marked the beginning of a new journey, and it was tough.

The amount of friends I had gradually decreased to nothing. Relations with cousins, aunts and uncles grew tense. My robotics team—probably my only source of social interaction at the time—dwindled down to half of its size. 

Of the departing teammates was a girl who I really liked, but I never told her how I felt—afraid that any relationship would get in the way of learning. That, and I was afraid of being rejected of course.

Doubt. Doubt filled my mind in those times. I doubted my decisions, doubted who I was as a person, doubted myself. Past, present and future was plagued with Doubt. I watched the world fly by me as I sat quietly and observed from afar, realizing it (the world) had no intention of slowing down for the boy who sat beside Doubt. I lacked those I could trust and rely on. For the first time in my life, I felt really alone.

I didn’t know if I had chosen the right path, didn’t know what was wrong with me, didn’t know why everything felt so uncertain.

But eventually I took action from the period of observation.  I realized that the world changes—for the worse or for the better, and that hope can never be completely lost.

I started talking to the people sitting next to me in class, listened to my dad (while suffering through his intense critique), and recruited new teammates for robotics… and Mr. T opened up to me the world of art and emotion, and soon I had too many meaningful things to do than to be sad and regretful.

I ended up occupying myself with leadership and learning, achieving some pretty great things by the closing of the year. Robotics was a passion, and I happily suffered to make it as far as we have. And as I made the best of my circumstances, I saw opportunities that everyone else failed to see. 

Was it worth it? Heck yeah.

The biggest lesson I took away from these early struggles was realizing that the world is dynamic, which makes it easy to get lost in. My grades and reputation alone aren’t enough to thrive. If I wanted to keep up with Change, I had to move, go out there, get involved, and stay out there. The struggle at the beginning of 10th grade was a buildup to one of the greatest changes in my life.

Of course, it took some additional values which I had developed over the years to thrive as I have in the present:

1. Be proactive – you have a great amount of control over what happens in your life. 
2. Ask for help – a new perspective can help us come to certain realizations. 
3. Find a passion – passion gives us direction. Or at least a distraction from depression.
4. Face the unknown – be okay with being uncomfortable. Comfort is a burden to wisdom.
5. Adapt to change – changing along with the world is crucial to staying on top of things. Be prepared to let go of old worlds, and step into a new one.
6. Do your best.